Sometimes talking to a friend means more then what is said.
Someone told me last night that I try too hard. And you know what, he was right. I try to hard at relationships, at work, at play. It must be my nature to try too hard. It seems like if I don’t try harder then I’m not a sucess.
I know what he was talking about thou…its relationships. He was my first ‘crush’, love, whatever you want to call it, and I tried too hard and in my mind we were perfect for each other. That’s another thing, my mind keeps me in trouble, but that’s another post. But reality was we probably never would have made it to 6 months. He’s a great friend and I still have a soft spot for him in my heart and I always will. He’s the person that smacks me in the forehead and tells me what my heart and mind already know when I’m too stubborn to listen to myself. And man I’m stubborn!
So I try too hard, yes, but when I don’t try I get crappy, stupid realtionships that are meaningless and I hate myself for being in them.
On the other hand, I’m also a big chicken and won’t fess up my feelings until its too late.
So thank you, for always taking the time to talk to me. Even when I’m crying my eyes out and its 9 o clock at night and I’m an emotional mess. It means so much to me to talk to you and have you ’smack’ me around a little.